Christmas Candle Scripture 15 – Meek

Matthew 11:29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

Meekness is a hard one to describe. According to Merriam Webster online, meekness means: the absence of any feelings of being better than others .

Synonyms: demureness, down-to-earthness, humbleness, lowliness, modesty

To me, being meek does not mean being a doormat, as is the common misconception. Meekness is the absence of pride and the willingness to listen to others. There are so many people out there who have a wealth of knowledge and experience to offer us, if we are just willing to listen to what they have to say.

Meekness is a hard trait to have sometimes. We all have our own knowledge and skills and sometimes it can be frustrating when someone comes in and starts instructing us in those areas. I know I struggle with this quite a bit. I’m no genius, but I know a fair bit about a few things. I’ve had to spend the last three years cooking gluten-free since Troy is allergic to wheat and I can get a bit annoyed sometimes when people try to tell me certain foods or recipes are fine for him to eat when I know they aren’t. Or when they tell us something just has a tiny bit of flour and he should be fine with that. Those are the times when I want to shake people and tell them that if their loved one was allergic to a certain food product that they wouldn’t let that thing anywhere near them, so why can’t they be as considerate with other people’s food allergies? But, that is not the correct approach. The best thing to do in situations like these are to just to listen to what they have to say and then explain patiently why that is a bad idea or, if they won’t listen, just thank them and leave it at that. 

There is a similarity between that and trying to have gospel discussions with people. I dated a Baptist a few years ago and we got along really well……………except when it came to religion. Most of the time we were able to have normal discussions about our religious differences, but other times it got a bit intense. During those moments when a discussion with someone of a different faith turns into a heated debate, the best thing to do is listen or try to change the subject. Listen to what their concerns are and what they are saying before responding. By being patient and listening, you may be able to diffuse the animosity and encourage the other person to listen to you as well. Be meek in a manner that shows you will not argue with them. By arguing and bringing negative feelings into a discussion that is supposed to be enlightening only causes a wider rift and a lower likelihood that a similar discussion can be had in the future. If it’s a situation where the other person clearly wants to argue, the best thing to do is walk away. 

Another trait of meekness is humility. We all like to think we’re pretty awesome and that the things we do are praiseworthy. And it’s true that everyone is special and unique. But we shouldn’t let that go to our heads or affect the way we treat others. Especially when we are in a position of power. At my last job, one of the supervisors liked to bully and humiliate people because she thought it was her right as a supervisor. She flat out said a few times that her experience and knowledge made her more valuable than the rest of us and that when we had achieved her status, then she would respect us. And then she wondered why most people didn’t like her and weren’t willing to volunteer for things when she asked. Once several people quit and the bosses discovered there was a problem, she almost got fired and her entire attitude changed. She actually turned out to be pretty nice. When we let our positions of authority or our opinions about ourselves give way to pride, it changes our behavior and can damage relationships. Meekness isn’t about having the attitude that others are better or that we are less important. It’s that nobody is more important than anyone else and that no matter our educational level, employment position, economic status, sports prowess or intellectual capabilities, that we all deserve to be treated with the same basic decency.

I think sometimes people see meekness as a bad thing, like they are downplaying the importance of what they have achieved,  are letting people get away with treating them badly or that by being meek they aren’t standing up for themselves. To me, meekness is accepting that people will act like that and you can’t change it by being mean back, so you love them and treat them as the Savior would. When we look at the life of the Savior, do you see a person who was trodden down and helpless or do you see a person who rose above and was full of strength? He knew He was the Son of God, but He didn’t let that position affect how He treated others or how He reacted to how others treated Him. He accepted his persecutions with patience and still felt love for the people who mistreated Him. He could have spent His days with kings and other rulers, but He chose to use His gifts, time and talents to help the poor and the needy. And no matter who it was or what their station was, He reacted with kindness towards those who mistreated Him. It can be hard, but that is what we should strive for, to follow the Savior’s example to love and treat with kindness those who do not treat us well and to treat well those whom we are in authority over. If we struggle with this, pray for help. The Savior will help us to develop these attributes in our lives if we as Him for help in doing so.

—As a side note, meekness does not include putting up with any type of abuse. If you are being abused in any way, you should not stand for it. Get help and find a way out, whether that means counselling for you and your abuser to change the behavior or leaving the situation entirely.  Abuse is not something the Savior wants us to have in our lives and He does not think it is arrogant or bad to stand up and say you should not be being abused.

If you yourself are an abuser, get help and make amends for your behavior. The Lord still loves you and can help you make positive changes if you take the steps needed. Talk to a friend, go see a religious leader, get into anger management, go to counseling. These things can help you and the Lord will be there every step of the way with you if you ask Him for help.